ME - A Freelance Hinduism Consultant

Ok, I realize that my RDA (Religion Decision Aid) project is gonna take some time. It's not done just like that! Actually I think I could do a few doctorates along the way. In short - I am struggling big time on my first religion! Just getting an overview of the gods, what they can do for you and how you worship them is an exhausting task. I still remember the story about Shiva and his woman though... the juicy story about how she took on 9 different shapes to get him... and their 1300 acrobatic positions. If all the gods had equally interesting stories, I'm sure it would be like a breeze and be done in no time. Unfortunately some of these guys are quite dull and nothing much to write about... can't really understand their function in the complete Hindu picture either. What are they good for anyway? I'm sure they could erase a few gods/deities to make it... tidier for a novice like me. Imagine all the Hindu wannabes who just loose faith completely when faced with this chaos of gods?! I think I will contact the CEO of Hinduism and address this problem. That's obviously why they are lagging behind Christianity (2 billion) and Islam (1,8billion)... with a mere 950mill fans only! Christianity and Islam is just easier to grasp for people that's all.

With my insight so far I could offer my services to the board of Hinduism as a consultant. The first thing I would do is slash some gods... and make it say 2-6 gods as opposed to "I don't know how many" today. Even for a long time settled Hindu it's hard to keep track, so they drop out. And where do you think they're going... converting to Islam and Christianity of course. What is left is only the fanatics! For a sustainable religion though you need the broad masses... the average Joe's to stay and feel like they are capable and on top of their religion. If 950mill Hindus today are mainly the fanatics - imagine what a potential they've got! They will pretty much drain Christianity, Islam and the rest if they can just trigger the masses! That's where I come into the picture. With less gods and just commercializing the whole thing a bit, we should be there in a generations time. That's pretty short time considering how long they've struggeled for the 950millions. I think I can leave the RDA project and specialize instead... and still make big bucks. The future is bright indeed!! When I'm done reshaping and giving Hinduism a facelift with a new image as I picture it now, I might even convert myself.

Some of the figures used here and in my last post are taken from the book; God-101. The author Allan W Janssen sent me a copy of the book. I think he and I got one or two things in common. It's a damn good read! Amusing, Interesting and factual all in one! True to god - I promise!!

Religion Decision Aid - RDA!!

I've been unusually concerned with religions lately. Particularly Hinduism, since I've attended some Hindu festivals and functions lately. So, curious now, I took it one step further and did some research on what Hinduism is all about, ref Heaven and Hell. I found it quite interesting although I don't find all of the Hindu customs overly appealing. I guess it's the same with religions as with so many other things - you have to take the good with the bad. In any event I thought I can't be too judgemental. After all it's the only religion I know anything about by now... apart from Christianity, the Norwegian state church. I had this brilliant idea that I could do some comparative research on the biggest and most popular religions. In that way I could make a Religion Index... or score card to see the pros and cons clearly. People need this kind of thing as your choice of religion is not like buying groceries... or at least it shouldn't be, god forbid!

Lee Iacocca (Ex CEO of Ford and Chrysler) always said that any report should be funneled down to a one page summary for him to bother to read it. He refused to read exhausting long reports. I admired Lee Iacocca after reading his autobiography. So now, in Lee Iacocca's spirit, I want to make a one page comparative summary of all the major religions. It's a groundbreaking piece of work, I'm sure of it, and very important to people around the world. It actually amazes me that such a thing doesn't exist already. What the hell have all the religious people been doing all this time. They are so enthralled with their own beliefs and don't bother about anything else. But wouldn't it be a natural thing for a religion to try to claim a larger portion of the worlds believers, and in that way become more powerful? I know at least one religion that in my mind seem to have a quite aggressive approach... What bothers me is that the other ones don't seem to fight back. This could be like an american election... only worldwide and about your choice of religion for the coming year. Then my one page summary/score-card would come in very handy, no doubt about it. Well, even today I think it should be a human right, together with the rest of the "rights" from the UN or Amnesty International or wherever... to have this onepager to make your choice easier. I believe too many people are never presented with all the facts about other religions and therefore make a bad decision. I can help these poor souls! Maybe I can even sell it and make big bucks?! Religion has always been big business... and how ironic that this could be my highway to fame and riches. Me - a Stensby?! Hahahaha!!

I am quite happy about my reports about Hinduism so far... I just have to sew the Kavady festival thing together with the heaven and hell thing... and make it complete sort of. But my god... or I should probably say gods (plural!!!). It's a big mess! I haven't figured out where all the Hindu gods fit in yet. You've got Shiva, Brahma, Krishna, Hanuman (monkeygod), Ganesha (elephantgod), Vishnu and my favourite Lord Murugan - yet there are still many more. I thought it was a sin to have more than one god in this day and age... and that most up to date religions had boiled it down to one god only. Obviously I've been terribly mistaken! Even more reason for my one pager!

It could serve as a popularity index as well I'm sure. It's a well known fact that people don't want to make unpopular choices. So maybe it feels safer when you know that 2 billion other people around the world made the same choice as you. It's basic consumer behavior. After your purchase you're alert and looking for any kind of confirmation to tell you that you did the right thing. You want to know that all your neighbours also picked Hinduism, and they're gonna praise you for it! I know, only the weak loosers would choose according to such popularity factors, but get real. There are millions of loosers out there who needs exactly this thing, and I'm gonna sell my one-pager especially to that part of the market, hehe. I'm sure my religion-index would make some friction between some of the competing religions as well. If there are no election campaigns already, I'm sure my one-pager will change that quite soon. All the priests, bishops, ayatollahs and popes will fight for your membership to improve their ranking on my index. It's gonna be awesome!!!

I should decide on the most crucial factors when choosing your religion. Sort of key factors that I can rate each religion up against each other. Heaven(s) and Hell(s) are obviously very important. Your choice of god also I guess... or gods I should say. Are they nice... or strict... or will he/she/they give you some slack? Of course also, how often would you have to pray, attend services... and pull chariots and that kind of things? Anything that can add stress to your already tight schedule must be considered. A pain/no pain homage to serve your god(s)?? I could of course add more factors with time... I have something to start with at least - can't wait! Here is my first sketch... giving you an impression of how the one-pager score card is gonna look. I've named it RDA for now! Religion Decision Aid - RDA!!