Zim election!

Our domestic helper (Judith) went home to Zimbabwe recently to visit family. Upon arrival officials took her passport, and rumours said that it was because of the election at the end of March, tomorrow to be specific.

Earlier this month Judiths husband went to deliver his vote back in Bulawayo, Zimbabwe. At the same time he asked what options Judith had, being in South Africa. They soon found out that Judith had in fact voted already - but she was completely unaware herself. No wonder Mugabe is confiscating passports! It doesn't hit the media like the ordinary massacres. I was just thinking about all those people that drowns trying to cross the river to South Africa. If Mugabe has put up a net downstream, he can probably pick up a lot of passports... and Zim-salabim VOTES!!

The newspapers report that everything looks fine in the Zimbabwean election. What a joke!!

Zimbabwe’s (Bob’s) NEW national anthem!

Driving back after my dives at Aliwal Shoal, Umkomaas, I’m listening to some heavy metal. This is one of my rare opportunities to really dig my own music… as it is banned inside the walls of our home. Once in a while I need a dose of metal with some proper oomph! Usually it makes my foot heavy on the accelerator. Heavy metal is not compatible with the slow lane in my mind, although my driving has matured over the years. Now, I hold the speed limits even! It’s the cruise control on our new car that makes it possible. I don’t mind a few extra minutes, so I pull over to the slow lane and put the cruise control a few km below speed limit. Imagine that! I want this moment to last! Very chaffed about my two dives for the day, I am really in the mood for some potent riffs. I turn up the volume and play some Megadeath. How else could I better end a perfect day of diving and doing my own “guy things”?! As I listen to the text of the song though, my thoughts wander from sharks and Manta Rays to Bob! It strikes me that this particular song could serve very well as a national anthem for Zimbabwe, at least as long as Bob is in charge. The text goes:

You take a mortal man
And put him in control
Watch him become a god
Heads are gonna roll…


It’s a blueprint of the Zimbabwean history under Mugabe! And the very fitting name of the Zim anthem is of course; “Symphony of destruction”!

Carlsberg and swastika

A while ago I was talking about the use of the swastika symbol during the Kavady... and discussing the meaning of the swastika with Tiffany... I know for a fact that it symbolizes something pure, and that it was a fitting symbol for Hitler when he wanted to promote his ideology, his party and the pure arian race.

Last night during a beer tasting get together, my friend Geir actually gave me some interesting information about the swastika that I did not know. Carlsberg... probably the best beer in the world actually used the swastika symbol in their marketing up until 1940. Obviously the pureness thing was a nice thing to associate with the beer to try and sell some more beer. Even today you can see other labels of beer telling you how nice and pure the brewing process really is... trying to convince you that this is the right choice of beer for you. Pure or clean seems to be important values to link to beer. Carlsberg had the swastika symbol obviously until Hitler gave the swastika symbol another meaning. They had to give up the swastika emblem... as Hitler had ruined their marketing... and the value of the symbol. Swastika was forever ruined as something positive in marketing.

I'm surprised Robert Mugabe haven't made use of the swastika symbol as yet also. He cleans out the white farmers from the country, then he wipes out all resistance... they must obviously be of a different breed. Then he demolishes some villages and slum areas and kill some random people on the street... By now he should have a pretty narrow and PURE genepool left. Worthy of a bold black swastika if you ask me.

Shaka Zulu, Holy Olav, Caesar… and Bob???

When Øyvind was here and we were down in KZN (KwaZulu Natal) I was giving him some of my own knowledge about the Zulu history. When Shaka Zulu came up in conversation I recall comparing him with Harald Hårfagre. Harald Hårfagre gathered the whole of Norway under the rule of one king. He traveled the country and recruited the chiefs around and fought the ones that resisted. Pretty much the same as Shaka Zulu did as far as I’ve heard.

Shaka was very persuasive in his recruitment… join me or die. I guess it’s the only way to do it… When Holy Olav (another great Norwegian Viking king, Olav den Hellige) came home to Norway after a raid… and a crusade, he was a converted Christian. Very excited about his new belief, he now wanted the whole of Norway to convert as well. It was very easy! Olav traveled around the country and gave the heathens two options. Convert or lose your head. Soon the whole of Norway was fanatic Christians. “God” had conquered Norway and replaced Thor with the hammer and all the other gods in the trees and rocks. I don’t know how big a role religious beliefs or spiritual stuff influenced Shakas cruelties though. Maybe his personal Sangoma made him take out a competing Sangomas tribe or something like that. In a case of hard resistance I’m sure Shaka had some gutting to do after the preceding stabbing and killing. Beautiful Killing!

I have to get my Norwegian history straight here, coz I’m mixing and confusing the kings here… although I know quite a few were taken out by some close and trusted people. Shaka Zulu was so hard against his own people that he turned some of them away and against himself. His half brother killed him in a big plot. Pretty much like Caesar: “… you my son Brutus”! It’s like copy and paste, same story all over the place, wherever you turn!

I’m looking at a map of KwaZulu Natal here, showing all the known mission stations in the area. Amazingly there were quite a few Norwegian mission stations in the heart of Zululand… in the area in and around Hluhluwe where Øyvind and I were driving around. Maybe these were descendants from Holy Olavs disciples? And not maybe, but quite likely they had a discussion with Shaka over a clay pot of local beer… giving Shaka insight in the successful Viking way. Wow, I’m overwhelmed with my own facts and findings here! And people say the world is small today…?!

If the world really did “shrink” a lot since then… and my “copy-paste theory” still applies, then Bobs (Robert Mugabe’s) relatives are terribly overdue in this end of the world! Maybe there is light in the end of the tunnel after all… coz Tsvangirai sure didn’t convert to Mugabeism and he is not decapitated yet! Maybe ignoring history will be his end?!

Sugar, honey honey… March 10th

Stopping by that sugar-managers house today was quite interesting. There was a lot of talk about sugar and the production process. Think I must beg for a guided tour there some time. The sugar cane goes in at the one end, and comes out as crystallized sugar in the other end 8 minutes/hours later.

The sugar cane industry in SA is a purely Indian thing! Thus they also favoured the Indian engineers to fix this and that on the mill. Once they had a Indian guy over to get water brought from 2km away into the mill. He was streetwise, and not an educated guy at all. The way he worked however impressed everybody. He also managed to bring the water into the mill using no pumps or compressors or anything like any engineer would be expected to use. The aqueduct or whatever he made works well even today, and saved the mill lots of money over the years. They were so happy with the guys work that they bought him a white horse when he wanted to get married. In India they have more than 400 mills around the country, so the sugar-mill engineers are very sharp over there and therefore highly appreciated over here! The Tongaat mill was the second mill established in South Africa, but is today the biggest producer in the country.

I also learned that there is more to sugar than just white or brown. Actually brown sugar is generally healthier, and contains more nutrition. In Tongaat Hulettes Sugar alone they produce about 300.000 tons of sugar in a good year… and about 30 different varieties. To make the white sugar they use chemicals, and in the process they wash (bleach) out much of the healthy nutrients.

Back in the days white sugar was considered much finer than the brown sugar. When people got visitors they used to hide the brown sugar and bring out the exclusive white sugar. Today, however it seem to have changed… and the brown sugar is found everywhere in the cafes and coffee shops. Brown sugar is in fashion.

The sugar cane normally requires 18months of growing to reach the full size and maximum capacity sugarwise. Today however, because of pressure in the industry, they cut the sugar after 12 months mostly so that the farmers can get their money back faster. The canes are therefore not as thick and nice as they used to be.

When the sugar production started in KwaZulu Natal in the 1860’s, the conditions were perfect for growing the canes. It is an understanding in the industry however that the ideal “belt” for growing canes has moved northwards to Mozambique and Kenya. Why? Because of global warming! The “belt” seems to have missed Zimbabwe though! Not because of global warming – but because of Bob. The land and the natural recourses was easy to steal and redistribute, but stealing the machinery to work the land was probably harder to justify.